Colossians 3:18 - 4:1 → Rules for Christian Households
- Steve Schott
- 7 days ago
- 9 min read
Theme
► The main theme of Colossians, in my opinion, is the deity of Jesus Christ - His fullness as God, and His complete sufficiency as having done all that is necessary to save us from our sins.
► Colossians 2:9-10a → "9 For in Him all the fullness of Deity dwells in bodily form, 10 and in Him you have been made complete,..."
→ Who Jesus is, is complete - the supremacy of the Person of Jesus
→ What Jesus has done, is complete - the sufficiency of the work of Jesus
• There is nothing that we can add to this to effect, improve, or add value to, our salvation.
► Paul will spend the rest of this letter, both carefully elaborating on the divine character of Jesus, and also being very specific about the completeness of what Jesus did on the cross to obtain our salvation.
► Attacks, if you will, from outside the church (and perhaps some from inside the church), that suggest that more is needed, specifically within the framework of our human efforts, to fully obtain salvation, will be shot down like enemy missiles, the intent of which is to destroy our faith.
Outline
► An outline of the Book of Colossians
→ (This is the outline used by the group of teachers I participate with at our church. All of my blog postings for Colossians are following this outline)
Theological
• Pretty much everything in this section (chapters 1 and 2), including Paul’s greeting, is dialoguing about the truth of Jesus, and how it has impacted our lives, and will continue to do so in the future.
• Even when Paul is dealing with the false teaching, he’s dealing with the false teaching in light of the truth about Jesus he’s already dealt with up to that point.
1 → Introduction to the Book of Colossians
2 → 1:1-12 Greeting and Prayer for the Colossians
3 → 1:13-18 The Preeminence of Christ
4 → 1:19-23 Reconciliation Through Christ
5 → 1:24-29 Paul's Ministry to the Church
6 → 2:1-7 Reaching the Riches of Full Assurance
7 → 2:8-15 Made Alive Together With Christ
8 → 2:16-23 Let No One Disqualify You
Practical
• Once we get into chapter 3, and through chapter 4, Paul’s approach will be much more centered on how to live out this true gospel in our everyday lives, in the community of the body of Christ.
9 → 3:1-8 Seek the Heavenly, Put to Death the Earthly
10 → 3:9-17 Put on the New Self
11 → 3:18-4:1 Rules for Christian Households
12 → 4:2-6 Steadfast Praying, Wise Walking, Gracious Speaking
13 → 4:7-18 Final Greetings
Intro to today's passage
► In my last couple of posts I highlighted some "put off" and "put on" attributes for those who follow Christ. Putting off sinful behaviors and attitudes and putting on the godly ones. Putting off selfishness and putting on selflessness. Putting off caring only for ourselves and putting on caring for others. It's what Jesus would do.
► In today's post, we'll be looking at some very practical applications of these principles, in 3 primary relationships. Each set of roles will be viewed from the subordinate one first, followed by the authoritative one. Remember that in Christ we are equal, but we have different roles. None of us is any better than anyone else. But we function differently as individuals.
→ 1st we'll be looking at the relationship of marriage, and discussing the different roles of the husband and wife.
→ 2nd we'll focus on the relationship of parents and children.
→ 3rd will take us into the somewhat controversial roles of masters and slaves, but will be applied in our modern context of employers and employees.
Passage
Husbands & Wives
18 Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them.
→ When wives are directed to "be subject to your husbands", this isn't a call to be a doormat.
• Just as all believers individually submit themselves to the leadership of Jesus, wives are called on to place themselves within the leadership of their husbands.
• While some might think this is denigrating to the wife, in reality it's a directive to the husband to be a worthy leader.
• In life, submitting to someone else is easiest when that leader is worthy of being followed.
• I can see a wife's role would also entail the equipping of her husband to help him become that worthy leader.
→ In similar fashion, being a husband doesn't give you the right to undervalue, or dishonor your wife.
• Husbands are called to "love your wives". In Ephesians 5:25, we get a little more info... "25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,..."
• How did Christ love the church? HE DIED FOR IT!!!
• While wives are asked to take a more subservient role, husbands are asked to die.
• Husbands are also called to "not be embittered" toward their wives.
• It could be that when a wife fails to allow the husband to lead, he might become upset, but he should focus on doing whatever is necessary to meet his wife's needs.
• I've always thought that when a husband is being sacrificial for his wife's benefit, it makes it that much easier for the wife to place herself in subjection to the husband.
Parents & Children
20 Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord. 21 Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart.
→ Paul goes on to encourage "children" to "be obedient to their parents IN ALL THINGS (emphasis mine)".
• Obviously, children do not have as much experience, or knowledge, or wisdom, as their parents.
• Parents, I believe, generally want to protect and nurture their children.
• So children should seek to allow their parents to do that.
• Sometimes (maybe a lot of the time) a parent will tell a child to do something, or to not do something, without explaining why.
♦ A child needs to learn to obey, both immediately and unquestioningly.
♦ An example of this would be a parent calling out to their child to STOP as they are beginning to run into the road to retrieve their ball.
♦ In that situation, the only thing the parent is depriving the child of is either injury or death.
♦ But after those types of situations, it should be explained to the child, to help them grow in their own wisdom and understanding, so that in the future they will be able to enter into those situations with caution to avoid any harm.
→ Fathers (and I believe this really applies to both fathers and mothers) are cautioned to "not exasperate your children".
• I can see that it can be very frustrating for a child, when they are told to obey, but never told why. We need to engage with them to help them understand.
• This doesn't mean that we just give them whatever they want, all the time, because they might not agree with us on what is safe and what isn't. We need to draw the line somewhere for their own protection. Trust me, when they have kids of their own, they'll totally understand.
• But we have to start somewhere, and I think the exasperation can come in when we have the old "do as I say, not as I do" attitudes, or the "do as I say or else" mindset.
• Our children are a precious commodity. We need to treat them carefully, lovingly, and respectfully.
• To not do so could lead them to "lose heart". And Paul encourages us to not do that.
Masters (Employers) & Slaves (Employees)
► The context of this next section alone can be extremely confrontational.
► Let me say this clearly and definitively - slavery is wrong. I do not for a moment believe that it is right for one human being to own another.
→ I can't quote you chapter and verse to support this, but I just can't understand how any one person can actually feel that this could be right.
→ That being said, we need to understand that, while the bible doesn't clearly condemn slavery, it acknowledges that during the times of the recorded biblical documents, slavery was a common activity.
→ Also let it be noted, that for the most part, slavery in the Roman world appears to be far removed, for the most part, from what the American slavery experience was.
• It was common in the Roman world, for at least some slaves, to actually be highly educated, and highly depended upon individuals, who would serve as doctors and teachers and such.
• Again, not defending slavery, but rather trying to explain it in it's historical context.
→ And in the context of this passage, Paul isn't condemning slavery, but is showing us how to live as Christians, whether we be slaves or masters.
→ Paul does mention a person named Onesimus in chapter 4, and will devote the entire letter to Philemon, who is Onesimus' master, appealing to Philemon to treat Onesimus as a brother, rather than as a slave.
→ A careful reading of the letter to Philemon would, in my estimation, encourage any believer holding slaves to free them of that bondage.
► All that being stated, we will review the slave/master relationship in a more applicable format, by applying this section to employees and employers.
22 Slaves, in all things obey those who are your masters on earth, not with external service, as those who merely please men, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord.
→ As employees, we are called on to be obedient to our employers.
→ And to also do it with "sincerity of heart", or as I would say, with genuine honesty.
→ Our service shouldn't be limited to only when the boss is watching, which I would understand it to mean when the text says "external service".
→ But we need to remember that our "true" boss IS always watching - Jesus.
23 Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve.
→ When the text says "whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men,...", while the context here is in this particular relational situation, I believe that this can also apply to ANY aspect of our lives.
→ Striving to live up to Jesus standards (WWJD) in ALL of our life situations - marriage, family, work, play, etc. - just seems to be the right AND the best thing to do.
→ In our employment scenario, we may not always be compensated and/or acknowledged as we would deem appropriate, but we should remember that ultimately Jesus will reward us for how we live down here. So in a sense, it will all come out in the wash, so to speak.
→ And then that last reminder, that regardless of who is our employer, it is really "the Lord Christ whom you serve."
25 For he who does wrong will receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that without partiality.
→ We need to keep in mind, that just as we are rewarded ultimately by Jesus for our "work", we will also be reproved for our lack thereof.
→ My thought would be that if we really took to heart the concept of considering all the work that we do as being for Jesus, I'd think that we'd try to do our absolute best.
→ One would hope.
→ And masters/bosses need to practice "justice and fairness", remembering that they also have a boss, who also rewards or judges from an eternal perspective.
So What?
► This passage gives us two aspects or viewpoints on human relations.
→ 1st, if we are in a subservient position (and all of us are at some point in our lives), our priorities are to be submissive, obedient, and working hard even when the boss isn't looking.
→ 2nd, if we are given a role that puts us in authority over others, we need to be loving (in the sacrificial sense), and teaching and enlightening and nurturing, and being able to be just and fair. Remembering all the while that even in our authority, there is still Someone in authority over us.
Photo • 02/22/2025 - Bitter Creek National Wildlife Refuge, near Maricopa, CA
“Scripture quotations taken from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995
by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. lockman.org”
All linked verses are from the YouVersion at www.Bible.com
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